to the most precious friend i've ever had...

dearest distanced closest, bestest, coolest, cutest FRIEND..

Hi there, how have you been doing? hope ok, and yeah i'm doing great and felt never good before.. well, atleast now i know that... :) so hey, Its been long time we havent spoken like this... and i know it sounds weird i'm writing you this when i see you now.. but what to do, we've become so distanced right?

anyway, dear, have you been wanting to be so strange with me after being such a nicest friend? were you expecting to be so distanced? sigh! :( i have tons of complains... i know, i used to be the one who kept advising you on being strong and being ownself... but now, i think i cant keep it anymore, when it became a thing about you, things are diferent! i'm hurt, i donno why, but i am! i know i know, you didnt do anything but i donno, i hav the feeling of LEFT OUT thingi u know, it gives me the feeling to cry...
life was so great when i met you... you turned out to be my crying shoulder, the greatest fan of my life.... you used to be there when ever i faced a difficulty, you would never wanna see me in stressed mood.. you would never let me feel bad on anything... you would want me to stay besides you to listen to you, and expects me to come up with good ideas,,, we would have tons of chatting.. wow, can u think of how hilarious we used to be?
did you know, if i havent met you i wouldnt have been able to stop my self doing the damn shitty thing i was doing... and i am so greatful for you.. i really wanna thank you for being the greatest person in my life.. but i guess our time came up.. the world is a cruel thing, now i believe it... it would just show us elutions and leave us in to the dessert of reality and never let us face the truth! unless we realise it on our own...
i had this fear long long before... but was trying to make it up.. was trying to take a pace... was trying to let the fate decide whats gonna happen next.. guess its already seen now.. you used to tell me, how kewl we used to be.. i wonder what happened now,,, we used to share everysingle thing we had in our minds.. why cant we do it now?

maybe i am the one to be blamed... maybe i am expecting too much from the CLOSEST ones.. i've had friends in my life,, some so nice and the others so weird... amongst them, you were the bestest of all... and u knew it very well.. but why do i feel that i m so SO SOO LEFTOUT... u seems like you don wanna share a thing with me.. i feel like you're done with me... i feel hasitant to have a conversation with you... but WHY? this souldnt be happening dear! we used to shout out anything at our faces!! we were so kewl with that...

i wish i cud talk this at your face... but i just wouldnt do that.. cause you the only one who took care of my biggest problem in this WORLD... in my LIFE... and i really am thankful to u for that... but still, its just so unfair for u being so distanced... i wish i cud ever understand what happened, or whats going on...

i am so sorry i had to reach you this way, cause i cant keep it all inside my heart... it hurts.. and the feeling, i don wanna show u or anyone else.. do u know?? people are making up stories about our friendship.. it hurts a lot! i dunn wanna hear them say we look so DISTANCED.
wish i cud get an answer to my feelings..
yours truely friend
pempi